The Stuff

I fill my life with objects, people, and memories that are not permanent. I have weird ulterior motives that I don't even understand, and I'm not sure which is worse - admitting that I'm not perfect or admitting that I don't want to be perfect. Right now, my bookshelf is half-filled with the books I'm most proud to own and have read. The other half contains all the books that I want people to think I've read, or books that I aspire to read, if only I had the time. Sadly, though, any time anyone looks through my books, they only ask about the books that fall into the latter category, and I'm left to explain that "I've heard it's a good book, too..." I write a blog, partially for others, (because wouldn't we all like to think that people read our thoughts?) and partly because I enjoy my own writing. I love thinking about sharing this stuff with my posterity someday, even though I'm sure they'd be bored to tears if they heard one more story of me baking banana bread and laughing uncontrollably on a Monday night. Seriously, guys, my life is pretty boring. I use stuff to make me feel better about the fact that I'm still in Utah, without any prospect of moving or having some sort of grand adventure. Please dismiss the fact that my normalcy is unavoidable, and feel free to continue thinking I'm some sort of genius.

{Don't stare too hard or you'll notice all those aforementioned imperfections.}

Drink Up

Tonight I sat in my apartment and pondered the meaning of life. Just kidding. I watched as my roommate wrapped a gift for her boyfriend in crumpled red paper, and I attempted to explain my current status as an ever-happy single girl. Please believe me when I say that I'm so happy. This isn't even something I have to convince myself to believe; I feel it each morning as I anticipate what funny phrases or absurd experiences I'll have. Today's highlights include:

• Watching fifth-grade boys dance to Usher's "Caught Up." Absolutely hilarious.
• Hearing a first-grader say, "I'm questioning: where did I come from? who made me?" and watching her classmates all respond, "God!" Out of the mouths of babes.
• Going to my other job--the one with smart people--and having my boss tell me that I have a post-it note stuck to my butt. It gets better. The sticky note definitely said "Have some!" on it.

In the midst of the wrapping-paper conversation, I mentioned to Carissa that my relations with boys extend just as far as my supposed talents are concerned. In a one-week span, two of my really good guy friends proposed the idea of having me as the lead female vocals in their imaginary bands. Ha. I don't think I sing well enough to be backup, let alone the lead vocals in a "She & Him" cover band. Then, last night, Kade told me that we need to design our own television show for HGTV. Sure, wandering around Home Depot usually brings out the home decorator in all of us, but I don't find my taste in window coverings to be anything inspired. Whatever. Alas, at the moment I'm nobody's girlfriend, but I'm both a musician and a designer. Take that.

One Trick Ahead of Disaster

Right now, my life definitely parallels that scene from Aladdin where he does all the fancy dodging and jumping in order to escape the guards. I'm not quite as nimble as I need to be, but I am using my fair share of ducking and sprinting in order to avoid all of the pressures around me. I'm running from adulthood. I'm fleeing the responsibilities and maturity that I should embrace. I've made it to "one jump ahead of the breadline," but it's just because I'm a split-second quicker than the others. While my parents continually warn me about the dangers of not settling down, I know that my air of restlessness is just one whiff in a world of clueless pre-adults. I read all about it online one day, and even though it's debatable and disproved by many of my more-responsible peers, I'm one of the statistics that makes this study believable. (Read more about it here.) I'm flipping through life - not entirely without a plan - maintaining my grip on reality only as far as tomorrow is concerned. Check back next week to make sure that those steadily-approaching duties don't have the best of me.